Saturday, February 23, 2013

The Magic of Tea

It’s Saturday here in Abu Dhabi and I just woke up from a wonderful nap…a rare occasion, I might say. This passed week has been an emotional roller coaster as we are starting to say goodbye to good friends who are making that trek back home to resume their lives in the real world…(those of us here will understand that particular sentence all too well!) I can’t believe that so much time has passed and that we are at that stage of our adventure here. There have been many dinners, lunches, and morning cafĂ© conversations about this lately and for many of us, it’s a first time experience…saying goodbye is not fun!! No doubt about it, it’s not easy…nor is it any easier to do it for those of us who have done it too many times already. Knowing the literal and physical being with each other changes, places in the heart for these dear friends do not change and the good memories of what was here will now come into play for the most part over an email or a phone call and a very nice cup of tea. I know this may sound a bit too simplistic at this particular moment, but when I think of those people who through the years became my good friends…my best memories are surrounded by my time with them and a warm cup of tea.
Some of my fondest memories of my time with Carolyn and Sarah were on the road to Newark England on our way to the antique market. Those trips would not have been  complete if we had not included the cozy and small out of the way places we found on the search for a good cup of tea and scones. Weddings, baby showers, and rehearsal dinners have all been planned around Peggy’s kitchen table with our tea in hand and more recently Terry telling me I needed to meet my Nancy who has become my “partner in crime” happened over a lovely cup of tea. I have relived my story with my boys watching my friend Naz and her two young men over a cup of tea sitting on the floor with them rediscovering Big Bird and missing my guys at the ripe old age of four and two. And rarely does a conversation happen with my sister that a cup does not accompany our times together in person or on the phone. I go way back and think of Diana and Karen and getting to know them in our initial years in the Navy, wondering if I could do this as they was my example and years later offering tea to those young wives coming in who didn’t know what to expect… Yesterday several of us gathered to bid our friend, Terry goodbye. The event started with tea and conversation and ended with...tea and conversation.
 Tea and friendship...words that belong together. When tea is offered, no words have to be shared. It’s simply understood, don’t you think?

Monday, February 4, 2013


The literal definition of the word 'therapy' means 'curing' or 'healing' and is the attempted remediation of a health problem. In the medical field, it is synonymous with the word 'treatment'. Among psychologists, the term may refer specifically to psychotherapy or 'talk therapy'. Thank you Wikipedia for that...please take note that I used W because it was the first to pop up when I was curious to see what definition I would get in print and I liked what it said because it allows me to compare it to what MY definition of therapy overnight trip with my girlfriends starting with being sequestered in my car for 3 hours there and back with non got it...psychotherapy! There it is...the official definition of the ability to talk about nothing!!! How many times have the men in your life asked you...what DO you talk about!!! And the answer is (typically)...nothing...accompanied with a smile. Do we tell them that the word 'nothing' is code for everything...or do we just keep that to ourselves???

My friend Liz is moving back to the UK and my tennis buddies and I wanted to do a girl's weekend before she left. So off we went the other driving, Nancy navigating, and Liz and Talitha passing out the food! For me the stars had aligned and I was in my element. It had been way too long since my last trip with my girlfriends and I missed it! We headed out to the coast to an island called Sir Bani Yas. There were only 2 stops made...Our Starbucks companion lasted only  for so long! There was a ferry ride and arrival at our final destination. We had high hopes of a grand tennis game and time around the pool, but that was not to got in the way believe it or not, and we found ourselves with a guide out to their animal reserve looking at red deer and searching for giraffes. They have discovered an old monastery out there (built in 600AD) which we found very interesting and enjoyed being outdoors as a whole even though it was quite chilly and we actually experienced some liquid from the sky called rain. Questions were flying and our south African guide, Ted was happy to oblige. Returning to the resort, we headed for the spa for a quick steam and settled in. Now what??? Oh is where I discovered that women and pj's are truly universal. We ordered in, shared wonderful glasses of prosecco, and continued our non stop talking about everything...and our pajamas(said with a smile). The more we talked, the more we laughed. Watching these new and everlasting friends of mine, I important it is to our true wellbeing to laugh, cry, confess, and contribute with others especially with our girlfriends. We discovered things about each other that I found quite normal...three of us have always wanted to look like our beautiful, blond, tall, and gorgeous Talitha! One of us would like to experience larger endowment of her upper's that for tact??? One of us was panicked as the rugby score was not what it was supposed to be and one of us wished she had hair that would behave!

The art of laughing is so enlightening and in this setting, it was there and I realized how much I am going to miss us as we move on. Saying good by is hard. I wonder, though, can we just redefine it and say so long...till we meet again? Abu Dhabi and tennis brought this unique group of women together for a reason, I think. The physical being with each other changes, but feelings of the heart and friendship do not. There's a trip to reunite in the works and that helps letting go a little bit...something to look forward to! But lives will go on...I can tell you I will pay more attention to rugby now, will laugh with myself when I think of this wonderful experience with these wonderful women from different parts of the world remembering how we talked non-stop about...well....nothing (she said with a smile).